Monday, September 27, 2010

Slaying the male ego: An Update of my Summer Events

Greetings my submissives:
Many of you have been enquiring on my whereabouts during the summer months; specifically relating to my lack of blog posts during this time.

This past summer 2010 has been an extremely exciting and eventful time for me. It was a time filled with new adventures and new beginnings. With the approach of autumn comes a slower pace and with it time for self-reflection. It is in these moments of introspection that I turn to my blog for a creative outlet. As before, I will now have time to write new posts more frequently.

One of my adventures this summer involved something that I have rarely done ….. I very briefly dated another Dominant. Knowing very little about Dominant male mentality, I was quite taken by surprise at the vulgar and base nature of the untrained male ego.

This Dom Male was laughable in his attempts at male bravado. His behaviours and exaggerated posturing was comical. I have never seen anything like it. I have zero patience for this type of childish male behaviour and therefore I decided to abruptly end the courtship.

Let me first preface by saying that both of us entered the partnership with the mutual agreement that this would not be a D/s relationship. Instead we would be equals.

His male ego, when we were out in social situations was unable to exhibit any type of self-control. Anyone and everyone he would encounter would be greeted with hostility. The more that he tried to exert his male prowess the less respect I had for him. It made him seem weaker in my eyes. Some Dommes are truly capable of level-headed Domination of their subs. This man’s Domme behaviour, in my opinion, stems from a place of weakness and vulnerability. He enjoys putting others down in order to make himself feel strong, because I venture to guess that inside he feels afraid and insignificant.

He was not a real Domme at heart, but rather a scared little boy in a man’s body. The typical women that he dates are not well-trained subs. They were timid girls with low self-esteem.

Though the relationship was destined to fail from the onset, it was a beneficial experience for me from a learning perspective. I hunger for knowledge; especially when it relates to human behaviour and sexual psychology.

I have an abundance of respect for my well-trained and disciplined submissives. My submissives have a strong sense of self-worth, are intelligent, goal orientated and possess a great strength of character. Their characters are built by the training that they receive from me.

A soldier that is disciplined and harshly trained for battle is looked up to in our society for their ability to serve and follow commands. Soldiers are not insecure and they are not weak. In my opinion “real” male submissives. (Not a man experimenting with submission as a way to spice up his sex life) A real male submissive to me is exactly like a well-trained soldier. His life, his daily decisions…what he wears, when he eats, when he sleeps and all his activities of the day are governed by me. This is the ideal arrangement that I aspire to achieve.

I am practical and know that financial/career obligations during working hours take precedence. But I would enjoy to be in as close of a 24/7 relationship as I can.

I have been working on my list of duties for my future 24/7 sub. Perhaps I might even decide to later publish that list here in a future blog post. This list would be a morning till night account of the tasks my sub would perform for me….. from bathing me in the morning to changing my clothes and massaging my body with essential oils every night before bed and all the other daily activities in between.

After all, one can become quite tired and in need of a good massage after a long day of slaying the male ego. My imagination soars at all the exciting possibilities.

Until next time my devoted slaves.

~ Madison

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Responsible BDSM: My Definition

Responsible BDSM must contain the following qualities: Be between Consensual Adults, give mutual enjoyment, contain safety measures, involve discussions before every scene, and not be permanently scaring.

The above mentioned list is of my own creation. Each Domme and sub should have their own list in their minds of what should and should not take place.

Every relationship is different and every situation needs to be re-evaluated.

This now is Madison Moore’s Personal Definition of Responsible BDSM.

Consensual Adults

This is an absolute must. If the activity is not consensual it then becomes abuse/torture. The classic example I use is CBT (Cock and Ball Torture). If the CBT is consensual then there will be mutual enjoyment for both D/s. If a Domme was to perform CBT on a man whose only fetish is Tickle Torture then the CBT would be abuse because it is not consensual.

Consensual also implies that both Domme and sub remain sober (no alcohol/no drugs). It is impossible for a sub to give their consent if he/she is under the influence of a mind altering substance. It is also impossible for a Domme to respect the responsible limits of BDSM when intoxicated. I do realise that there is slight room for deviation from this rule if the BDSM is done within a committed relationship and the couple have explored BDSM before. An example would be 1-2 drinks between a husband and wife but not to the point of intoxication.

I use the term Consensual ‘Adults’ because after all it is not only illegal but also unethical to participate in any BDSM activity (even an activity of a non sexual nature) with anyone under the age of legal consent. In most countries the age of consent is anywhere between 18 – 21.

The word ‘Adult’ also implies ‘Human Adult’, which means, responsible BDSM does NOT include animals of any kind.

Mutual enjoyment

BDSM after is about enjoyment; both physical and psychological. Discussions before each scene are imperative in order to maintain mutual enjoyment. I take the time to not only discuss which particular activities my sub is interested in but I also endeavour to discover their psychological needs during a scene.

For example; a common activity that my subs and I enjoy is forced feminization/cross dressing. By asking psychological questions I will determine if the sub is interested in cross dressing as a form of humiliation or if they enjoy the process of cross dressing and want to look and act pretty.

The activity of cross dressing takes on different meanings depending on the sub’s emotional needs.

Safety measures in place

Safe words are a must. They should be negotiated well before a scene is to take place. My most commonly used safe words are: Red and Yellow. Exactly like a traffic light, red means stop and yellow means slow down. It is important to choose a random word for this purpose. “Apple, July, Tea, ex.” are good examples. I find it also a good role of thumb to keep the safe word between 1 – 2 syllables. This is obvious. If the sub is seriously in pain and is being injured, the injury is only going to continue until the sub catches his breath to say the long winded safe word.

Discussions before the scene about the subs physical state are also essential. I always ask my subs the following questions before an initial scene.

Has the sub done the activity before? This will give me an idea of how soft to start out at the beginning to give the sub an opportunity to discover his/her personal limits.

Does the sub have any medical conditions I should know about? Heart conditions, diabetes, epilepsy, all of these conditions will dictate which activities we can do.

Does the sub take any regular medications?

Does the sub have any past or present injuries or surgeries? This is very important. I specifically want to know about injuries to the knees and back. This will come into play on whether the sub is put on their knees, in a small cage or other positions I have in mind.

Basic human considerations when doing a long scene

  • Dehydration
  • Washroom breaks
  • Does the sub take medications during the day
Food can be omitted during a day. But only if the sub does not suffer from diabetes, hyperglycaemia or is not on any medications where food must be ingested with each dose.

No permanent scars

Responsibility is in the hands of the Domme and I take this very seriously. Personally I do not believe in leaving permanent marks. There will always be temporary markings; a sore and red bottom, superficial scratch marks, and the light tracing of where the flogger was used. But I don’t leave scars. I know I am unusual in my thinking. I have seen many photos of permanent scaring. I realise this is done often.

We all have our personal limits, and Dommes are no exception. For me my Hard Limits include scarification, needle play, branding, burning and any form of knife play. Scat is also on my hard limit list, though it does not have relevance in the context of scaring.

Sadly I have heard of many incidences of novices being physically scared due to lack of knowledge and poor communication between D/s.

BDSM can be a wonderful world full of potential enjoyment and pleasure. It is my hope and objective with this blog to educate readers on responsible play, and in turn to increase their levels of enjoyment and fetish release.
Question of the Day for male subs:
“How are you aiding Mistress Madison Moore to promote her blog and eventually find a literary agent?”
Email me your response to the Question of the Day email address: yesmistressmadison@yahoo.com
Until next time my lovely pets, I wish you a very pleasant and kinky week.
~ Mistress Madison xo

(This blog can also be found on wordpress in a more reader friendly format)
http://obayonline.wordpress.com/

Sunday, May 30, 2010

A RESUME FOR A CAT

Ms. Terra Trinity
Email: ms_karma_kitten@yahoo.com
____________________________________________
OBJECTIVE:
A position as a feline ambassador, where I can utilize my expertise in feline communication and community relations.

CAREER HISTORY:
  • Feline Ambassador (March 2003 - Present)
  • Daily implementation of hygiene protocol
  • Independent utilization of automatic nourishment receptacle
  • Management of all schedules and itinerary of fellow co-worker
  • Security and surveillance of rodent intruders
  • Supervision of lavatory use
  • Camouflage and concealment
SKILLS & TRAINING:
  • Spheroid Reconnaissance and Retrieval Certificate
  • Co-habitation Training
  • Doctorate in REM Nocturnal Sleep Management
PERSONAL INTERESTS:
  • Manual defacement of broadloom
LANGUAGES:
  • English, Feline
REFERENCES:
  • Upon Request
  
(Hope that put a smile on your face! Goes to prove even a Dominatrix has a sense of humor)
~ Madison

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

The Ethics of Money Slavery

I have an internal dilemma that I am trying to work through. I am hoping that sharing my thoughts in print will give this situation some clarity. The issue revolves around money. More specifically my current lack of it. And it has got me thinking about the ethics of money slavery.

This emerging phenomenon within the BDSM community has many names: Money Slavery, Financial Slavery, Human ATM's, Money Piggies, Financial Humiliation, Financial Domination...and probably many more terms that I might be forgetting.

The concept is simple, the financial slaves are used for their money by a needy Princess/Mistress. Some will go so far as to incorporate consensual blackmail. But is this practice a legitimate form of BDSM or is it just abuse?

I am grappling with it right now. The idea of marketing my need for money and essentially begging for it is repugnant to me. Yet, my disgust is overshadowed by my unpaid bills and my empty wallet.

True BDSM to me involves more of a physiological component. Both D/s do not need to be in the same room together. I for one excel at maintaining online relationships with my subs. I ask myself ..."Can there be room for financial compensation; compensation for my time?"

The internet is littered with copious amounts of humiliation websites. Men from all over the world gladly will pay for the opportunity to be humiliated via email, web video or they simply enjoy reading the Mistress's humiliation posts.

My dream is to one day have my own website, and yes it would be a paid-membership based site. To me that is a legitimate business where I am being paid for my services. Financial slavery on the other hand feels like begging.

Here is my dilemma. I first need money in order to pay a web designer to create my website in order to make money. So that brings me to the "Sub Question of the Day" As a matter of fact, this day I have 3 questions for my subs.
My 3 questions for my subs today are...
  1. Is money slavery a viable means of income for a Mistress, similar to a website capitalizing on member subscription humiliation?
  2. Is there an emotional benefit for the sub to financially reward his online Mistress?
  3. Have you had a Financial Mistress before?
Email me your response to the Question of the Day email address:   yesmistressmadison@yahoo.com
All replies will be read and appreciated.
Until we meet again my loyal servants

~ Mistress Madison
(Stay tuned, in my next blog post I will reveal to you what Responsible BDSM means to me)

Friday, May 14, 2010

My Weird 'little' Fetish

The wonderful thing about fetishes is that they can be developed at any time throughout our lives. It is exciting in adulthood to discover something new that we find thrilling and exciting. And so was the case with my weird ‘little’ fetish.


The fetish I am referring to is Small Dick Humiliation (SDH). Oh, how I love it! Sometimes I suspect I enjoy it more than the guy I am with.

It was only this year that this new fetish was introduced to me. I had heard about it before, but had never practiced it. My ex-boyfriend confessed to me one night his interests and asked me timidly if I would humiliate him and laugh at his tiny little baby dick. He was 4.5 inches when erect.

From the first scene we did, it was obvious to me that I was really good at it. Playfully mocking and teasing him became a huge thrill for me. Even now as I write this, just thinking about SDH is getting me wet.

I often ask my subs why they like it. I have asked myself the same question. There are two aspects of it that I enjoy. Firstly, the humiliation feeds my sadistic personality. Degrading a ‘man’, and I use that term loosely, is exciting. Rejecting a man’s size is such a taboo. Women are taught to lie about a small dick to spare the man’s feelings. Secondly, SDH is empowering to me as a Domme.

My list of sexual interests and fetishes are quite long. I have posted the extensive list under the 'my interests' page if you are ever so inclined to read it. Out of all of the items on that list there are a few that stand out as my favorites....small dick humiliation, cuckold, forced bi and pegging/fisting of my male subs.

Out of all my favourites, small dick humiliation is the most difficult one to explain to a potential boyfriend. If fact, for me, it is impossible to explain it unless the man already had that fetish before meeting me.

I can just imagine how that conversation would go. I'd be dating a man in a vanilla relationship for a couple of months and inevitably the union would progress and become physical. At some point most men will ask the woman they are with if she likes his size. Let’s say the man is a bit above average, around 6 inches. I cannot very well open up to him and say..."Actually, I secretly wish you were only 3 inches, because I would really enjoy mocking you, pointing and laughing at how small you are. Then I would like to sleep with another man in front of you and tell you how much bigger he is”.

I love small dick humiliation and I miss it very much. I think about it daily. Before now my last SDH was in late February, before my ex-boyfriend and I broke up. My hope while attending fetish munches is to network and to find a boyfriend of my age group that shares my fantasies.

That all changed two weeks ago when I had the opportunity to enjoy it again with a man that was ridiculously small. You cannot imagine my surprise and delight to discover, once I got out my ruler to measure him, that this guy was an entire 1 inch smaller than my ex. His baby dick, at 3.5 inches erect, broke my personal record and is the smallest that I have ever seen. I have affectionately nicknamed this guy Peanut.

I think I am actually going through SDH withdrawal ha-ha. It is something I need to do often, but sadly cannot because I am currently single.

It is wonderful how SDH is not only extremely humiliating for the male, but it is also emasculating. There is nothing in this world that I hate more than the male ego.

The male ego is selfish, irresponsible, disrespectful, needy and responsible for acts of stupidity, sexual aggression and violence.

It is my strong opinion that every man should be under strict orgasm control, to curb the evil influences of their male egos.

My search continues for the perfect SDH boyfriend. I have my magnifying glass out and I am ready. Line up boys, and prepare for inspection!

~ Madison

Monday, May 10, 2010

Facebook Relationship Stats

Tonight I have decided to spend the evening alone. Perhaps I will periodically check Facebook, Twitter and all the other social networking sites out there that make us feel like we are connected to other human beings; when in reality we are still sitting at home alone.


Originally I had planned on attending a social munch tonight. This event promised to be completely different from the last. The previous munch was an educational evening with discussions and member participation.
The munch tonight is more of a casual gathering. The venue is a local club. The munch group, I am told, blends in with the rest of the crowd. The objective for the evening is to socialize and get to know other people in the scene.

I will probably attend the next one which is to be held in June. But tonight I cannot bring myself to leave the house. Tonight I just feel like being alone. My date tonight will be a glass of white wine and a Blu-Ray disc.
Though it is true that I am currently single and am half-heartedly looking for a relationship, lately the idea of dating is exhausting to me. So many first dates, and very few that I find intellectually interesting and very little chemistry.

I have been on Facebook for a while, yet despite what was happening in my personal life, I have never changed my relationship status. It has always remained listed as ‘single’. I find it very comical to see some Facebook members that change their relationship status as often as the weather. My opinion is to wait until there is some type of certainty before announcing the relationship.

I have taken the time to poll my close friends, and there is a huge difference between male and female opinion on Facebook relationship status changes.

My male friends tell me they are hesitant to announce a relationship because it is something they don’t normally announce anyway. Most men I have seen leave the ‘relationship’ field blank.
Stereotypical women on the other hand are very quick to want to announce a new partnership, and change their status with great vigour.
It is not the relationship status per se that bothers me. It is the humiliating and humbling act of admitting defeat and changing the status back to ‘single’ once the relationship is over. I have no illusions when starting a new relationship. I am not pessimistic, I am just realistic. I don’t see every new boyfriend as a potential life-long partner. I see the relationship as what it is; two people getting to know each other. After all, if two single people meet and decide to date then the truth is that 100% of their past relationships have failed. That is the truth.

Relationships were much easier back in high school before social networking sites. If you started dating someone in high school every one of your friends would know about it from day one. And if by chance you happened to eventually break-up, well everyone would know about that too.
It would be very strange to apply the Facebook rules of etiquette to the high school scenario. On Facebook a couple is prone to wait, let’s say for a month or so, before announcing their union. This would never work in a real life social setting.

Imagine a boy and a girl dating in high school. The boy would be asking for some serious physical injury if he suggested the following....”Let’s date for one or two months but not tell anyone. By all means you can be one of my friends during school, but I will continue to sleep with you behind closed doors. And if anyone at school asks, I will tell them I am still single”.

I will play devil’s advocate here and ask: why is Facebook any different. If you are in a relationship, why then would you hide it from your friends and still tell the world you are single while sleeping with the girl/boy you are with?

Perhaps Facebook should add an additional choice: ‘currently dating’ or ‘seeing someone’. Would that make things easier?

Funny enough, I have actually heard of relationships ending because of constant fights over the controversial Facebook relationship status. I find that incredibly amusing!

Will I ever change my relationship status? I guess we will wait and see.

I welcome your comments.

~ Madison


Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mother's Day

Aw Mother’s Day. The holiday conjures up images of spring flowers, sunshine and family gatherings. This year is no different. Today I will be venturing out for our annual Mother’s Day dinner with the family.
I have always wondered how others in the BDSM scene relate to their families. Especially those that live the lifestyle 24/7. How ‘outed’ are most kinksters to their families?

My relationship with my mother is an unusual one. We are extremely close. In fact I would even venture to say that my mother is my best friend; as cheesy as that may be. I am very open and forthright with her regarding my life. She is wonderfully open-minded and understanding.

My mother is a psychologist! It was very interesting to say the least to grow up with a psychologist for a mother. By profession, they have a way of getting patients to reveal their souls against their wills.

Growing up, I was the typical antisocial misanthropic teenager. I was an angry and bitter Goth girl. I detested being at home and spent a lot of time out with my friends. Any time that I did spend at home was spent locked up in my bedroom.

I recall one childhood memory with my mother. I was 16-years-old. I had spent the better part of that weekend locked in my room listening to music; only venturing out for food and the occasional washroom break. There was a knock on my door. It was my mother wanting to talk. I rudely ordered her to leave me alone. But she was not budging. I decided to appease her and let her in, but in no way was I in the mood to talk.

Initially the conversation was very one-sided. She was very sweet and loving in her concern for me. Somehow, as she always does, at some point during our talk she worked her psychologist magic on me. The next minute I knew I was telling her all.

She did this to me every time! No matter how resolved I was to not say a word, in the end she always got what she wanted. It drove me crazy!

Now in adulthood there really is nothing I can say to her that would shock her. Throughout her training I am sure she has heard it all.

I would even guess that within the realm of BDSM, fetishes and unusual sexual perversions my mother probably has studied and knows more about it than most of us.

It is unfortunate that she discarded all of her psychology text books from university. I continue to have this insatiable thirst for knowledge.

It is my opinion that we must always strive to keep on learning and improving ourselves, regardless of our interests. Therefore I continue my journey to uncover the origins of sexual fetishes.

~ Madison

Friday, May 7, 2010

Question of the Day for Male Subs:What is your #1 Fetish

Tell me slave boys. What is your #1 fetish.
Question of the Day Email Address: yesmistressmadison@yahoo.com
Email me the following:
  1. What is your #1 fetish? Write it in the subject line
  2. Why does this fetish excite you?
  3. What is your earliest childhood memory regarding the start of this fetish?
Mistress Madison Moore has set up this email account for incoming mail only.
All replies will be collect and read, but not relied to. Information gathered through this email address and through ObayOnline will remain strictly confidential.
All names and identities of Sub Males that reply will not be published. Only data will be used.

This email address is reserved for Male Subs only to reply to ObayOnline's Question of the Day.





Wednesday, May 5, 2010

To Munch Or Not to Munch. That Was My Questions

As you might have read, on Monday night I attended my first ever Fetish Munch. Originally I had planned to post my munch report the very next day, but I decided to allow one day to collect my thoughts.
Before entering the venue I was mentally compiling a list of questions to ask myself once the event was over.

- What exactly will be occurring during the get together?
- What types of people are in attendance?
- Did I enjoy the event?
- Would I ever return and attend another munch?

My objective was to have the answers to these and other questions during the evening.
Upon entering the spacious loft like room I was quickly greeted by the events host. She welcomed me to the event and asked if I would like to sit down. The room was sparely furnished with a mish-mash of furniture. Single chairs, were lined up with sofas along side love seats. It looked like an indoor garage sale. No two pieces of furniture were the same color. The setting was a collection of disregarded furniture orphans.

I sat down in one of the sofa chairs and scanned the room. It was clear most in attendance had been there before. The familiar chatting of friends was heard in every corner of the room. The fact that I was a stranger there was not disheartening to me. After all, being my first munch I knew I was guaranteed not to know anyone there.

Soon after sitting, the evenings host addressed the group. We were told that within the first hour there would be an open panel discussion followed by a question and answer period. The last hour would be set aside for casual chat amongst the group members.

Though I did not actually take an accurate head count, by guess would be that there were anywhere from 20-25 people in the room. An equal mix of men and woman from the ages of 25 to 60. This munch was for Fem Dommes and submissive men. Let me tell you, it is never boring when you get a group of Fem Dommes together. The Dommes took over the conversation and contributed extremely riveting and insightful stories. I also spoke on many occasions during the event.

Everyone there was in plain dress. No fetish wear, no leather at all. It was a room of everyday people. Your accountant, your lawyer, your gardener. Just everyday citizens gathering together with one common goal. To learn from each others experiences in order to live a more fulfilling and happy life within a Female led relationship.

One Fem Domme in particular caught my eye. She spoke with confidence. She was articulate, well spoken, educated and was speaking from over 17 years experience living in the BDSM scene. I learned a great deal while hearing her speak.

An aspect of BDSM that I do not have prior experience in is the 24/7 D/s relationship. This is something I am very interested in. It is a rare opportunity to be able to get the chance to ask very personal questions to someone you just met and to receive such candid and honest answers.

As expected, my fellow Fem Dommes took over the conversation with great vigor. There were many times that questions were addressed to the submissive males, but all questions were followed by silence. I do wish the submissives were more verbal. I do want to learn from them and understand their needs.
No topic was taboo and nothing was off the table. We discussed sexual preferences, lifestyle choices and how couples initiate open candid conversations about sexual desires.

Candour about sexual preferences is something I have always envied and admired about gay and lesbian couples. For instance; I have found it to be true that most vanilla couples will engage is sex first before actually sitting down to discuss it. Sometimes married couples will never discuss it. The first time heterosexual vanilla couples have sex it is usually the same. Boring missionary position. It is a given that 'part A' will be inserted into 'slot B'.

Gay and lesbian couples have to discuss things ahead of time. Who will be the top and whom will take the role of the bottom? Will the lesbians use a dildo or a strap on? And if they do use toys, then they must decide who will receive and whom will be the giver. Sadly heterosexuals are still very much closeted about their sexuality, and almost ashamed of it.

I am not ashamed to be a sexual being and it was so refreshing to be able to really talk and exchange ideas.
I enjoyed the event immensely and I intend to return for the following meeting as well. This munch I attended holds meetings once a month.

There is a different munch scheduled for kinksters under 35 years old, that will be held next week. I am planning on attending that one as well. The members will be completely different. It will be interesting to see which munch and age group has greater audience participation. Will the older more experienced group that I attended this week be more verbal or will the younger group next week be more excited to share their stories? It will be interesting to see.

And so my adventure continues in this strange and exciting world of BDSM.

~ Madison

Monday, May 3, 2010

Tonight I will be going to my 1st Munch

Tonight I will be heading out to attend my 1st munch. For those of you unfamiliar with the word, a 'munch' is a term used in Fetish communities to mean a get together/social gathering.

Munches are completely different from a fetish party or fetish event. There is no fetish play at a munch and those attending are asked to wear regular street clothes. Munches are often held in public places; restaurants, bars and cafes.

I have heard both good and bad things about munches. Some have reported a great sense of happiness to be able to join and chat with pleasant like-minded individuals. I have also heard that some of these gatherings are filled with very strange and creepy people.

It is very common in the BDSM community for kinksters to having casual play partners. Therefore munches are sometimes a way for fetish players to meet future play partners. It is for this very reason that I have avoided going to munches in the past.

My avoidance of causal play partners has not changed. My decision to attend this munch is a way for me to better understand the psychology and needs of male submissives. By understanding and interacting with more lifestyle sub males I will be able to better understand the root of their fetishes. This understanding will in turn assist me to become a better Pro Domme.

The most fascinating aspect of kink and BDSM for me is the psychology of fetishes, specifically when it relates to childhood and the nurture vs. nature argument.

These munches will allow me to discuss and get first hand anecdotal accounts from men on the origin of their fetishes.

Whether the experience tonight is a positive or negative one, the evening promises to at least be interesting. I highly doubt there would be a moment of boredom in a room full of kinksters.

I will post full details of tonight's event sometime tomorrow.

Until then,
~ Madison

Saturday, May 1, 2010

The Perfect Fem Domme/male sub relationship: my definition

When a man does decide to enter into a Female Dominated relationship with me he is setting the ground work for a life of happy servitude that will be physically, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically rewarding and fulfilling.
Sadly most men only come to realize the benefits of female led relationships later in life (in their 40’s and 50’s) after having unsuccessful vanilla marriages. No wonder most marriages fail when the vanilla couples never sit down and discuss D/s. The two people end up fighting for power and control in the relationship and it will in time fail.

Lucky for me I have managed to find and date a good number of the few handsome submissives out there that are in their mid-20’s and early 30’s.

With the right Domme to support and guide the male sub, a life of servitude will bring a great sense of purpose and meaning to his life. Within that union you will have trust, security, peace of mind and spirit.

BDSM when done properly, for me, needs to be done in a relationship. There needs to be trust, understanding, mutual respect and caring. I care for all of the subs I have been with. I know I am unusual in my thinking but intimacy is what I need to be able to Domme a man.

Casual play partners (whether the play involves sex or not) is still like casual sex for me. I am not interested in casual fun. A deep and meaningful bond is what I always aspire to achieve.

So what makes a good male sub? My definition of a great sub is a man that in his heart he has a desire, yearning, longing and drive to submit and to serve a woman in a loving and nurturing environment. A man that lives and breathes the role and has the psyche of a submissive. And with his submissive personality and disposition would come an abundance of gratitude and appreciation.

Appreciation is very important to me. If my sub is truly grateful for my time and verbalizes his gratitude it demonstrates to me that I am not wasting my time.

Training a new sub is very laborious and time consuming. I take great care when training a new sub. His appreciation is vital in the D/s union.

Though I have had many subs throughout my life, I have not as yet taken on and collared a slave. This is my wish. I am always looking to find the right mix of obedience, past training, servitude abilities and sexual chemistry.

Therefore my search continues xoxo

~ Madison

Thursday, April 29, 2010

My apprenticeship has begun!

Time for the big reveal. What is this new career that I am embarking on?

I have begun my apprenticeship to become a full time Professional Domme! I am very excited. 

There is a huge difference between BDSM experience within a one-to-one relationship vs actual formal career training.

I have had extensive experience within the BDSM world within my private life, but have never been mentored and never had my techniques graded.  Off hand, some of the things I have enjoyed participating in with my boyfriends are: (GIVING) Ass training (pegging, fingering, fisting), humiliation, sissification, bondage, small dick humiliation (my personal favorite), CBT, cropping, face sitting, face slapping, spanking, golden showers, making them give me forced oral and other forms of humiliation. There are many other things I have tried. But for now those are the main ones I have spent the most time on. I truly enjoy the psychological aspects of BDSM. Some people refer to it as the "Mind Fuck". I am extremely good at that and enjoy it greatly.

My confidence in my abilities to become an excellent professional Domme comes from the fact that I excel at the psychological needs of my subs. An apprentice Domme can learn invaluable techniques during her training, but it is very difficult to teach the psychology and also the improvisation to another student, if that student does not have dominance ingrained in her nature. 

Thinking back, all of my relationships, since I was 18 years old have been D/s relationships. This was even before I knew what D/s was. I have always maintained the Dominant role. It is ingrained in me, it is part of my personality and has been ingrained in me since childhood.

One of my earliest memories of childhood involve my dominant nature.  I was extremely tall for my age growing up. You would never guess that now because I eventually stopped growing at age 12 and stand now at 5'3". But as a child I was towering over my peers. Lucky for me, though my growth was stunted I did maintain my strength. I have always been exceptionally strong for my stature, and I remain so. It is shocking for a lot of men to witness my strength. 

The first male that I began dominating was my male cousin. I recall it began around the time I was 3 or 4 years old and he was a full year older than me.  There was tension between us due to the fact that he was beginning to come into his own and beginning to get a taste for his male identity.

He enjoyed wrestling with our female cousin. She was very weak, both physically and emotionally and was prone to crying spells. I watched him wrestling with her and pinning her down. She always lost at that game. Though it was not really a game for her because she was never a willing participant.

So one day, he approached me with the same confidence he approached my female cousin and began to wrestle with me. I promptly pinned him down and made him admit that he is a weak little girly-boy that had lost to a girl; a girl younger than him in fact.  Suffice it to say, the boy was enraged. It then became his mission to beat me.

It was so much fun for me. I would chase him around and not only wrestle with him but I would beat him up. Punching, slapping, sitting on him...I was in heaven.  I would not cease up on him until I made him cry.  The "game" as I called it would go on every time I was in a room with him. He began to fear me after a while haha.  My greatest pride came one day when our grandmother took me aside after one of my victory matches and she asked me to stop beating up my cousin. She said that if the both of us were boys it would be different. But it was not proper for a girl to beat up on boys. She said it was not good for his confidence to be beat up and made to cry by a girl!

What a boost to my childhood ego that was! I still continued fighting with him, but I was more secretive about it. Once I got him to cry I would let him go, but now I would give him a warning. If he told anyone, then the next time I would hit him even harder.

My fun officially ended a couple of months before my 6th birthday because my parents and I moved to Canada. 

From that time on I have maintained a D/s dynamic with the men I have interacted with.

Yesterday (April 28th) marked my first day of training. A blog post on the events of that day will follow. I'm still trying to formulate an idea on how to chronicle my training. There are two factors that I am very conscious of as far as censorship is concerned.

First and foremost, I have complete and utter respect for the privacy and anonymity of my clients. Though I have not yet taken a client professionally, I will in the near future. I grapple with the technicality of maintaining client confidentiality but also being able to share with my readers my journey as I learn.

My second consideration is my respect for the Dungeon that I am working in. I will adhere to all the house rules and I will never reveal house secrets.

How then will I share with you my experiences? By concentrating on my personal experiences (my thoughts and feeling) and telling you the basic subject matter of my training.  I can do this easily without giving away training secrets. 

Besides, how utterly boring would this blog be if it contained nothing but step-by-step lessons. If you are looking for that you will not find it here. Go on YouTube and you will find instruction videos on anything you wish to learn. There are so many resources online that will teach the technical aspects of BDSM.

My readers will receive much more valuable knowledge. An inside look at the inner workings and daily life of a Professional Domme.

Let the journey begin!

The question of the day for all the SUB MALES out there

For all you Sub Males out there, I want to know what general industry do you work in.

Follow the link and respond.  http://poll.fm/1v1wn

My goal is to be the best Domme I am capable of being. There is always more to learn.  I aspire to become a great Domme and I strive to always be improving my skills and abilities.
It is helpful for me to have an idea of where most of my clients are coming from.
Cheers
~ Madison

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

The Introduction: What is this Blog all about

Hello to all:
My name is Madison Moore. Welcome to my web page.

I will begin by giving you a run down of my objectives for this blog, because they are many.

1st- Writing down my thoughts will be very cathartic for me and a form of self discover/self therapy haha
2nd- I am in the process of changing careers, and I mean a complete and total change. It will be interesting to document the process I go through and it might help others who are considering this new career. (what career am I getting into you may ask?...more about that later)
3rd- Along with the career I am still looking to find a relationship/boyfriend. It is more of a passive interest at the moment but the interest is always there. I still have some trepidation about jumping into another relationship. Mainly due to the fact that I have not completely recovered from my recent breakup.
4th- Hopefully during my time here I can some how entertain you and give you a glimpse into my strange little life.

Creating this page has also led me to decide to expand my interactions with other like minded people. It would be nice to meet others out there that are as eccentric and weird as I am. I was the Goth girl in high school and always kept in my own little group. We were anti-social, free thinkers and very misanthropic. But then again possibly most teenagers are.

My pattern for congregating within small groups has continued in adult hood. It is now time to meet more people and to open up to new possibilities.

The first two social media profiles that I have opened are on facebook and twitter. I will attach the links below.

My goal is to write in this journal often. If not daily then at least 3 or 4 times a week. I will try my best to not censor my thoughts. You will get the raw me at every step of the way.

Tomorrow is an exciting day for me because it is when my journey truly begins.  I will leave you with that for now.  Lots of juicy details to follow.

Cheers
~ Madison

http://facebook.com/mistress.madison
http://twitter.com/ObayOnline